The Wedding
At the age of 19, Norm and Mary’s daughter Ann began to discern that she was gay. This was a difficult process for her, and like many other young lesbian or gay kids, she contemplated committing suicide in order to avoid the pain and embarrassment of disappointing her family and her church.

Fortunately, she found a welcome home at the Middle Collegiate Church in New York City. Middle literally saved her life, as it has for countless other people.

Jennifer has a similar story of self loathing and of experiencing God’s grace at Middle Church. Having grown up in the Southern Baptist Church, Jennifer spent many years of her adulthood struggling with the pain of having been excluded from church. Middle changed that for her.

After going to the same church for four years and both working in finance at the World Trade Center, the two finally met one another in the spring of 2003. By Christmas of that year, they knew they wanted to make a lifelong commitment to one another.

Having ruled that "The history of our nation has demonstrated that separate is seldom, if ever, equal," the Supreme Court of Massachusetts decided that civil marriage should be opened to same-sex couples. This meant that Ann and Jen could be legally married in Massachusetts.

They decided on getting married in June, since both of their sets of parents had gotten married in the summer. Since they didn't want to cause controversy, they decided on a small, intimate wedding. Norm officiated, pausing briefly to cry throughout the service.

Because lesbian and gay people are not accepted by so many churches, several of Ann and Jen’s friends had not attended a worship service in many years. This offered a unique opportunity for Norm to extend God’s grace to them. There are several powerful stories of how this wedding helped heal part of the pain caused by the church.


ecclesia reformata, sed semper reformanda